Sunday, September 6, 2009

An important lesson !!

Six days long time ...well I have done a lot of stuff and so six days seems like eternity to me like the moment it seems like a good solid month u know ....well it was teachers day on the fifth of September ....I'm a part of a christian club in college and we have mass on every first Friday of the month ....and so this first Friday mass was dedicated to the teachers .....It was a lovely service ...the sermon was really great u know the priest was a Salesian ..who has worked in the missions in Africa .... he spoke about the qualities that a teacher should have ..and assigned a quality to every letter of the word TEACHER...he said that a teacher should be a coach and not a referee ....the main distinction being that a ref points out mistakes ...and a coach trains you to learn from them and avoid them ............he also quoted a line from the movie 'Lions for lambs' it was about a situation where the teacher is trying to get a extremely demotivated student to do something he is passionate about ..the student gets irritated and snaps back ate him saying that he is just a teacher he shouldn't be interfering in the matter ...however the teachers says that he is a sales man ....so the student snaps back n says so the what do u sell ....and then the teacher says the most profound thing ....he says ......."I sell you to yourself"....my eyes welled up when I heard this It was meant for me Very recently one of my class teachers who is also a good friend called me and questioned me bout my test scores ...she asked me ....whether I was doing my studies according to my full potential ??? I said no ...it was the truth ..I know I can do better but had no motivation to do so ...I don't know where I slipped .....Studies really didn't seem important any more I talked my self into accepting low test scores ....not really doing my 100% since 40-50% got me the required marks .... Well at first I was hurt and angry at the fact that my professor called me and gave me a earful about my marks and my lack of motivation in my studies .....I was almost in tears ...almost... But the next day Listening to the sermon during mass made me realise how lucky I am to have a professor like her teaching me ..who is genuinely concerned bout my academic performance.......... I know why I was lethargic and all ......I in some way rationalised....I don't know how ...(maybe to rationalise my laziness )........that we are all going to die some day and well we need to give importance to our immediate pleasures cause who knows if we would see the light of the next day.... ..this made me very impulsive in the studying department ...I have taken everything very lightly ...cause I know nothing very bad can happen ..or even if it does I would make it not feel that bad to me ......and so well I can say I was kinda wallowing in mediocrity ..It may not seem like that to the outside world but to me.. well....... I feel that way ........ Teh next day while having breakfast I was thinking of the previous day ...I thought aloud ...why struggle so hard if your going to die in the end ?????? And then like an answer to my Question there came another question "Why do I have to stop living even If I know I'm going to die one day??" and then It all became clear to me ....... Thinking that it would all be a waste I was wasting my self ....n now living the life to the fullest cause well its only this one life I have, makes sense ...........why should I let my self get wasted waste all my possibilities all the opportunities for the fear that it would all be useless when I would die ????Shouldn't that give me more incentive to live ????hell yeah!!!!!!!!!!! Its so simple now .....Its only one life make it large experience it fully !!!I know this is a very obvious view ...but the way it hit me!!!! It will stay now .....I will remember why I want to be what I want to be and why I don't want to settle for less ..............I am very pleased that I had this experience cause its not to late for me to change ...........And change I will ..I will do my best or at least try .....in what ever I do .......Ive got this new ideology and will stick by it ...if today was my last day would I be happy living the way I am living now ????I will be changing that answer to a yes ..... ........And no the sun isnt shinning out of every nook and cranny of my being but trust me Im getting there!!!!!....

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