The inevitable shift

Looking down upon myself,
I don't always like what I see.

Painful thoughts, Guarded lies,
That maintain the darkness surrounding me.

Demonic eyes that flash through,
 As they X-ray my hesitant soul.

I feel an earthquake deep inside,
Jolting foundations of structures old.

Pristinely they towered away,
Inspiring in me most awe, 

Now they lay waste these structures of clay,
As the earth beneath  them begins to thaw. 

Buried deep within it now I see ....
All those eyes, a part of me.
My guilt, my shame, my envy, pride;
The lust and jealousy I want to hide.

My hurt, my pain I dare to feel,
My humanness as they reveal.

Transition

I see it clearly but don't want to admit,
The colours fade out bit by bit,
 Revealing the deep deep parts of grey
As fond old colours are washed away.

My sullen face seems to pretend 

To find its peace as it faces the end 

Of childish dreams that the adult thwarts, 

Of ridiculous hopes left to rot: 

Deep in the grave where the tears dry.

To the weary soul, the naive li'l heart confides.